Conflicting COVID Weddings
Dear Annie: After months of careful planning, my daughter had to postpone her wedding reception last March because of the pandemic. She and her fiance made the difficult decision to go ahead with the wedding itself -- with only four people attending -- and reschedule the reception for later this year. They set the date for 20 months after the wedding, hoping that the pandemic would be over. She notified everyone on the guest list of the new date and has been looking forward to it ever since.
This week, one of her cousins announced that her own wedding will be just two weeks before my daughter's rescheduled reception. Because of the travel distances involved, it seems unlikely that all of our family will be able to attend both events. And because a wedding seems more important than a reception alone, it also seems likely that most relatives will choose her cousin's wedding and not attend my daughter's reception. My daughter is devastated.
How could her cousin be so thoughtless? -- Two Weddings
Dear Two Weddings: Your daughter is right to be upset. Is there rivalry between her and her cousin? Or is it possible her cousin simply forgot about the reception when she set her own date? If they get along, tell your daughter to talk to her, explain that she is devastated and try to work something out. Perhaps the two receptions could be combined. Of course, that sounds crazy, but the pandemic has created all sorts of crazy scenarios.
Dear Annie: I read your column about "Grieving Wife," the woman who was seeking advice for her grief. I had been married for 28 years when I lost my wife to lung cancer. A dear friend gave me the book "Don't Take My Grief Away: What to Do When You Lose a Loved One" by Doug Manning, and it was ever so helpful.
That dear friend eventually became my second wife, after she lost her husband, who was a good friend of mine. We were married for 26 years when she succumbed to chronic obstructive pulmonary disease -- yes, she was a smoker.
I'm now 90 years old (not a smoker), and I still miss them both terribly, but I think Doug Manning's book has continually helped me, even now. I have several copies and have loaned them countless times to friends who have lost loved ones. All have thanked me profusely. -- Coping With Grief
Dear Coping With Grief: You are such a resilient man, and with a first marriage of 28 years and a second one of 26 years, you were obviously a wonderful husband. You may have outlived both of your spouses, but you still exude faith, love and contentment. Thank you for writing.
"Ask Me Anything: A Year of Advice From Dear Annie" is out now! Annie Lane's debut book -- featuring favorite columns on love, friendship, family and etiquette - is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to email@example.com.