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Is dining with strangers the cure for loneliness? These people think so, thanks to a new app

Hira Qureshi, The Philadelphia Inquirer on

Published in Dating Advice

PHILADELPHIA — On a Wednesday night around 7, Morgan Steffy arrived at El Rey in Philadelphia's Center City area, following directions from an app she had downloaded two months ago. The app directed the 30-year-old West Philly software engineer to sit at Table 2, where she joined a Temple University doctor, a nomad who works in health care technology, a developer for a finance firm, and this reporter. Steffy didn't know anyone at the table, but the group of five had come to the restaurant that night for the same reason: to dine with strangers, facilitated by a new app called Timeleft.

Over plates of enchiladas, plantains, and fajitas, introductions and questions bounced from one person to the next as the quintet of strangers naturally fell into a conversation.

"What do you all do for work?" someone asked between bites.

"Are you guys big foodies?" another chimed in.

"What motivated each of you to come out tonight?" this reporter asked.

"I was so excited to find a way to meet people organically — that wasn't a sports league or kickball," Steffy said.

Her reply reflected a common theme among the group: a desire to build community without the pressure of dating. While other supper clubs and Facebook groups offer similar experiences, Timeleft is becoming the go-to for a growing number of Philadelphians.

The app aims to "create opportunities for the magic of chance encounters," according to the website, by pairing strangers for dinner and drinks. Created by French entrepreneur Maxime Barbier, Timeleft, launched in 2020 and added Philly to its roster of more than 275 cities in April.

It matches folks who sign up for dinner and drinks every Wednesday at various restaurants in the city based on a short questionnaire. The app asks questions like "What is your ideal night?" and "What is your zodiac sign?" to match five or six strangers for dinner based on their responses. On the morning of the meal, users receive details about the restaurant, their table number, and some information about the group (industries, nationalities, zodiac signs, and the main language spoken). Timeleft also provides conversation prompts to help break the ice.

That Wednesday, Timeleft groups dined at three restaurants: Bellini, El Rey, and Seorabol Korean Restaurant.

Restaurants are selected based on several criteria, including a 4.3 rating on Google Reviews, dietary restrictions, affordability, and ambience, according to Timeleft's website. The price range per person, excluding alcohol, is about $20 to $40.

Restaurants interested in participating can contact Timeleft's city managers via WhatsApp. Parid Spiro, owner/manager of Bellini, told The Inquirer that Timeleft folks book reservations for the dinners on OpenTable. "We never reached out to them; they just book us randomly," Spiro said. "We had never heard of Timeleft until they booked us."

When the bill arrived at El Rey, Cryus (who requested to not share his last name) volunteered to put his card down and asked the group to Venmo their share. Under Timeleft rules, each diner is responsible for their own meal. On top of paying their dinner bill, diners pay the app $16 for one dinner or as much as $86 for monthly subscriptions.

"After we had all gotten to know each other a little bit, I felt like I could trust you all a little bit more than the average stranger," he said.

This was Cryus' second Timeleft dinner. The Temple University doctor joined the app four months ago to meet people outside his field.

"It took me a little while to make it out to dinner just with my schedule and a hesitancy of how things would go," he said. "I didn't really have an impetus to go until one of my friends had gone to a dinner and told me about it."

The app paid off for Cyrus, who quickly joined a WhatsApp group chat with other Timeleft users.

Building connections beyond the dinner table

 

The group chat was started by Indira Rahman, a law student and frequent user of the app.

Rahman has attended 15 dinners since joining the app in June, using it in D.C., Los Angeles, and now Philly. The vibes of the dinners were different in each city, said Rahman, who currently lives in Philly's Francisville neighborhood.

"But the one thing in common was that this app brought together people who are all looking to meet new friends," they said.

For Rahman, "it's a way for me to share food with people I would have never met before." Though they're only in Philly for a year, Rahman has already attended eight dinners in the city. A member of a 400-person group chat in D.C., they decided to start one for Philly after their first dinner. What began with just a handful of people, now has over 100 members.

"I think it was during my 14th dinner that I really felt like I had met my people — there was just something about our table," Rahman said.

Members of the WhatsApp group organize weekend activities, expanding the community building beyond the app's experience. It's also where some members chose to bypass the app's designated bar for the "your last drink" part of the experience, opting instead to make Misconduct Tavern's two Center City locations their after-dinner spot.

Following Cryus' lead, the group at El Rey headed to the location on Locust Street, rather than the suggested McGillin's Olde Ale House on Drury Street. "It's loud and overcrowded [at McGillin's] for something like [this experience]," Cryus explained to the group.

As the group trekked to Misconduct Tavern, the conversations continued.

"[Timeleft] is like those running clubs, but without the running — I don't like to run so it's perfect," Steffy commented.

"You're saying this as my boyfriend is currently at a running club," laughed Valerie Comeau, who recently moved to Philly with her boyfriend and was hoping to make new friends through Timeleft.

At Misconduct Tavern, the party of five turned to 20 as the group joined the other Timelefters near the bar. Some came directly from dinner, while others, who didn't attend a full dinner, had coordinated through the WhatsApp.

Steffy joined a group near the bar, where Domenico Bilancieri chatted with his fellow group members about the night. He was in town for work and decided it would be better to not eat dinner alone. "Even if you're from a different city, it's a very nice way to go to dinner and meet local people," he said. Bilancieri is a regular user of Timeleft in New York.

By 10 p.m., many of the Timeleft diners had headed home. One of the last to leave was Michael Provencher, a remote data analyst residing in East Passyunk.

A three-time user of Timeleft, Provencher said he joined to connect with people outside his work Zoom calls. He had tried a bowling league but didn't find the same connections that Timeleft offered.

"I'm a married guy in my mid-30s and it's harder to make friends with similar interests than it was when I was in my 20s," said Provencher, who's considering buying a monthly subscription. "This app was a good opportunity to try new places in the city and sign up to sit in an uncomfortable place with strangers and share a meal."

The app has done the same for Steffy, who was excited to be added to the WhatsApp group and plans to sign up for more Timeleft dinners.

"In your 30s, you might still have your high school and college friends, but there's a good chance you've all kind of dispersed by that age," she said "So, it's sort of a new chapter. The nice thing about Timeleft is that it's never someone just inviting all their friends — it's this third [-party] thing that everybody goes to which feels really special."


©2024 The Philadelphia Inquirer, LLC. Visit at inquirer.com. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

 

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