Life Advice



Barton Goldsmith: And the darkest hour is just before dawn

Barton Goldsmith, Tribune News Service on

Published in Dating Advice

When things get very complicated and upsetting, feeling low is understandable, and things aren’t going so well in the larger world right now. It’s also not far from the time of year — late spring and early summer — when suicide rates are higher than at any other time of the year.

The thing to remember is that there’s always a better option. I’ve been very low at times in my life, but I’ve never been a candidate for suicide, because I know that the world can change for the better in a New York minute.

I have also worked closely with very suicidal patients who had a means and a plan, and had to be watched. None of them hurt themselves or anyone else, and they all now wonder how they ever imagined taking their own lives — every single one of them.

Medication, talk therapy and personal growth can help you get into a better state of mind and find emotional balance. If you’re feeling bad, make an appointment to see someone and set up a daily plan to get better quicker. Daily self-care will help you stay in a good emotional place.

Simple tools like these have saved many people from dying by suicide or living with unmanaged depression for the rest of their days.


The world is in a rough spot right now, which is only going to make it harder if you also battle with depression. Don’t let yourself believe that depression is “normal” because of the state of the world; that’s no way to go through life. You have to learn to let some light and lightness into your emotional space.

Maybe the way you are looking at things is inaccurate. Feelings, which can be caused by biochemical reactions, are not facts. What you are going through emotionally may be the result of bodily changes you are unaware of, so get a medical and psychological check-up if you are feeling very sad.

Life is never perfect. Mine isn’t. I go through my own stuff just like everyone else, but I also work on myself, which is important to do if you are going through a hard time. If you want to make an investment that pays real emotional dividends, put some time, energy and money into yourself. I promise you that it will pay off better than crypto.

Telling your story to a friend, a family member or a therapist can lighten your emotional burden and perhaps help you see some light at the end of the tunnel. If you are doing fine, but you know someone who could possibly be depressed, a great way to pay it forward is to take them out for coffee and just let them talk.

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