Life Advice



Erika Ettin: 7 quick tips for mastering the dating apps

Erika Ettin, Tribune News Service on

Published in Dating Advice

Ideas: A list of things you like, things you're good at, a funny story, a haiku, two truths and a lie, some fun facts about yourself.

What not to do: Write a novel, paraphrase your resume, say something generic, say nothing at all, say something offensive or lewd. Keep the sex out of your profile.

5. Messages

Again, short and sweet is the name of the game here.

If the other person provides "message bait," then all you have to do is ask a question about it. Notice they like to tango dance? Ask if they've been to Argentina. They mention they're a night owl? Ask if "late" is 11 p.m. or more like 3 a.m.

Other ideas if there is no message bait: Emojis with a question (like "pizza emoji" or "sushi emoji"?), funny questions, something relating to the other person's profile or picture.

What not to do: "Hey" "Hey, what's up?" "What's up?" "How's quarantine treating you?" Something sexually explicit. An insult. "Why are you still single?" (I could go on about this last one, but I'll save that for another day.)

6. Time period

As a rule of thumb, line up a date (or video chat these days) within three days of matching or three messages on each side. The key is not to lose momentum before scheduling the date.


7. Texting

Avoid it. Schedule the date/interaction right from the dating site or app. Texting is another, what I call, "obstacle to the first date," where you can inadvertently hurt your chances of getting to the date. Plus, on text, you can't reference the person's profile to "study up" before the date. I don't know about you, but I don't like to text someone I've never met!

Try these tips out, and you'll hopefully see more dating app success immediately!


(Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often intimidating world of online dating. Want to connect with Erika? Join her newsletter, for updates and tips.)

(c)2020 Erika Ettin

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