No matter how many marriages you've had, please don't stay in an abusive relationship
I was married to my ex for 20 years when we divorced. I wasn't attractive to him anymore since I gained weight with our three children -- his exact words.
I am now married to a woman. I have found myself on the receiving end of punches from her multiple times, each time with apologies. Recently, I was in our bedroom with the door locked, as I could tell she was angry. She began to beat the door down. Two of my children were home, and I'm guessing they didn't hear what was happening.
When I let my wife in, she punched me and I couldn't catch my breath.
I can't bear the shame of another divorce. I don't know what I'd tell people, what I'd tell my children. I am trying to move on with her, and forgive, but this time feels different. I feel so ashamed that I let myself get here.
I'd like the names of everyone on the panel who created the social law that one divorce is acceptable, but two divorces are so harmful to one's record as a human being that the second divorce must be avoided at all costs -- thereby freeing all second spouses to punch the breath from their partners' bodies.
[Tick-tick-tick from my kitchen clock.]
Right. There is no such panel, there are no such social laws, and there is no license for anyone to punch the breath out of anyone except in self-defense.
You loved, you trusted, you tried; you are worthy. Please do not sabotage yourself with shame. The blame for abuse falls to abusers alone for treating natural human vulnerabilities as opportunities to grab power.