Life Advice


Health & Spirit

Am I or is my husband the bathroom jerk?

Carolyn Hax on

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

Husband, wife, and wife's dad live together. Wife is in the bathroom, naked, getting ready for work this morning. Husband asks politely to come in briefly, wife agrees, husband comes in, does what is needed. Wife is facing the mirror, doing hair things, hands occupied. Husband walks out, leaving the door wide open. Wife squeaks in dismay, "Close the DOOR??!!"

Husband takes offense. "You could have just closed it yourself ... " (It's a small bathroom, door is within reach of wife standing at mirror.)

Wife points out Dad lives here too, his bedroom is next to the bathroom. Husband says, "It's just your DAD ..." because it's OK for middle-aged woman to flash elderly dad??! Ick.

Depending on the nature of mirror activities -- hair, makeup, contact lenses -- it could have been two seconds or 90 seconds before wife even realized the door was wide open.

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Husband thinks wife was a brat for snapping at him, and not just closing the dang door herself. Wife thinks husband was inconsiderate for just walking out leaving her naked with the door open. Both are offended and think the other owes them an apology.

-- Who Was the Bathroom Jerk?

Person Leaving closes the door out of respect for Naked Person. Duh. All he had to do was say, "Oops, sorry!"

He didn't. Instead, he turned on Wife. The question now being, what's up with that?


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