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Health & Spirit

Can't stop judging boyfriend's unladylike daughter

Carolyn Hax on

Again -- don't like her? OK. Your prerogative. She may well have crossed the line anyway between being her badass self and seeking attention for it. But that's not what you've cited here, and not what you're judging.

What you find distasteful about Becca all sounds like a 2018 remix of, so help me, her not acting like a lady. And the remedy for judging is to internalize how wrong it is to judge.

So please reconsider.

Thank you.

Dear Carolyn:

My 33-year-old son lives three hours away. He talks for six months about planning for major vacations in Iceland or Mexico, but I can't get him to commit to holiday plans. If he doesn't want us to travel to him for a visit or doesn't want to travel here, I'm fine. If he wants to stay home with his girlfriend (she's invited), I'm OK with that as well. I just want to know so I can make plans.

 

I've tried talking to him about it, but he puts me off with, "I'm not sure yet."

Any idea why I can't get a straight answer? It's tough to plan around someone who can't commit either way.

-- Loving but Frustrated Dad

Months of planning is how your son says "yes."

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