Life Advice

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Health & Spirit

Is girlfriend "crazy" for prolonging her dog's life?

Carolyn Hax on

On the other hand: The companionship provided by an animal is real. Obviously there are degrees of attachment, but I expect anyone who has ever bonded with a dog understands Amy, even those who'd opt for euthanasia.

Plus: She has her priorities, you have yours. Compatibility requires respect for each other's priorities where they differ. No respect, no you and Amy.

Finally, you've made this so binary. Where do you get the idea that if Amy loved you, she'd euthanize her dog?! That's just an emotional non sequitur. Her dog certainly isn't saying, "It's me or the guy," though maybe he is in his way (good dog).

You had the very viable option to say, "It's not my thing, but it's hers, so I respect that." It's not either-or. It's two individual sets of values you're both entitled to have -- and to try to reconcile.

But you leapfrogged to calling her "crazy." Yikes.

Re: Dying dog:

I put a lot of effort into supportive care for a beloved dog with congestive heart failure, and she got an extra year of good-quality life. If someone had had the self-centered nerve to suggest it meant I loved the dog more, that would have been a self-fulfilling prophecy -- I would immediately love that person a bit less.

 

-- Anonymous

Have I said lately how much I appreciate you guys? Readers who can write -- you're an education unto yourselves. Thank you.

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Email Carolyn at tellme@washpost.com, follow her on Facebook at www.facebook.com/carolyn.hax or chat with her online at noon Eastern time each Friday at www.washingtonpost.com.

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