Life Advice

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Health & Spirit

She slept with her friend's husband. Must she now be the group pariah?

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

I have a close group of girlfriends I have known for decades. We have helped each other through very difficult times over the years, and laughed and celebrated a lot as well. As you can imagine, we have also gotten to know each other's husbands and children very well.

I recently learned one of our girlfriends has been having ...Read more

Childless friend thinks he could parent better

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Jan. 18 and Feb. 1, 2004.

Dear Carolyn:

My wife and I don't have kids yet (hopefully soon), so I don't want to throw stones at people dealing with a stress I have yet to face. But we have friends who do have babies and toddlers, and who often are making (we think) bad choices for their ...Read more

Friend's decision to marry a dud speaks volumes about friend

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Jan. 21 and Feb. 6, 2004.

Dear Carolyn:

What do you do when a good friend is about to tie the knot with a dud? He's not a bad guy; he's just a dud. They live in different cities and fight all the time because he doesn't call, he doesn't write, he's not doing this, he's not doing that -- that'...Read more

Release girl, find rudder

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Dec. 3, 2003.

Dear Carolyn:

My girlfriend of a year and a half just broke up with me, saying she needed space. We both just moved to a new city (her for school, me for job/her). I don't know many people here, and we spent virtually all our time together, partly by design, partly by necessity....Read more

Boyfriend insists upon sex before marriage

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Jan. 30 and Feb. 1, 2004.

Carolyn:

I have a dilemma. My boyfriend and I have been together for 11 months. We love each other and want to get married. The problem is, he wants to have sex before we get married. I was raised to wait until marriage to have sex. I love him with all my heart, but ...Read more

Who she decides to kiss is not her ex's business

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Nov. 23, 2003.

Dear Carolyn:

Two months ago, my boyfriend and I ended our one-year relationship. It was one of those mutual but still painful breakups, and after a few weeks of slinging insults at me, he finally conceded and we forged what I hoped was the beginning of a friendship.

About two...Read more

A tomboy toys with playing the coquette

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Nov. 14, 2003.

Dear Carolyn:

You said recently that "good is someone who's eager to make time for you." Here, then, is my question: As a confident, extroverted college freshman with a lot going for me, should I pursue boys I want, or make them come to me? I'm not good at playing hard-to-get ...Read more

Happy news meets Mom's negative reaction

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Carolyn is away. The following first appeared on Dec. 10 and 17, 2003.

Dear Carolyn:

Last night I told my mom that I'm pregnant. Her reaction was, "What?! You're too young to raise a child! And how in the world are you going to pay for everything? This is a big mistake." Carolyn, I'm almost 24, I've been married for a year and on my own ...Read more

Mother of four abandons family for a beach rental

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My wife just left me and I am so angry at her I can barely stand to talk to her. She's had mental health issues for most of her life but until this last year she dealt with her depression pretty well.

We were together 15 years and have four kids who need her.

She just left one day ...Read more

He upgrades to first class, lets his girlfriend sit in coach

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

I am in a fairly new relationship (three months) with an attorney who divorced after 25 years of marriage. He loves to travel and told me that since he has a lot of airline miles, he books coach and always gets an upgrade to first class.

So when he and his wife, and then one girlfriend before he met me, traveled together, she...Read more

Offering support to a new mother

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My husband's sister is expecting her first child in the next few months. My parents-in-law are over the moon about this, and it also seems like this is really important to her husband.

The thing is, I'm 98 percent sure she doesn't want and never has wanted children. I was really ...Read more

Toddler daughter suffers injury while visiting family

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

Three years ago, our then-2-year-old daughter was in an accident while visiting my family for the first time without us, which resulted in her losing two fingers. Her father and I went through a VERY rough patch as a couple, because he was against her going in the first place -- but we got through it.

Fast forward to now. My ...Read more

Faking college

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I've pretended to go to college for almost four years when I actually dropped out my freshman year. I've been working as a temp since then and living "off campus." My family doesn't know since I fake my grades, account statements, everything. None of them went to college so it hasn't ...Read more

She thinks her sister's husband is having an affair, but she doesn't know the backstory

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My sister saw my husband having dinner with a woman. This woman is someone he met at a support group for an issue he has dealt with for many years. She has become a wonderful friend to him and I'm very glad he has her in his life.

However, my sister felt they seemed "intimate" in the ...Read more

Long-distance girlfriend jealous of boyfriend's friendship with foodie co-worker

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My girlfriend is jealous of one of my co-workers. This co-worker is sweet (she's married) and we share the same interest in food so we're constantly eating together -- lunches, snacks, and occasionally happy hour or dinner. My relationship is long-distance and when I bring up any plans I may have with my co-worker, my ...Read more

Live-in boyfriend wanted a party, but not the burden of planning or hosting

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My boyfriend and I hosted a party, our first joint hosting stint since moving in together a few months ago. The party was his idea, and most of our guests were his close friends.

Yet he did almost nothing to help me get ready for the party. We split up the tasks beforehand, but he "ran...Read more

Sister shouldn't play the role of parent to marijuana-smoking brother

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn,

I'm a 23-year-old woman living across the country from my family, and my brother "Justin" is an 18-year-old high school grad. Justin is living at home and working, and might go to university next year.

My parents just called to share that he has been caught with marijuana multiple times, always with friends, and most recently ...Read more

She worries she'll regret the decision to have only one child

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

My husband and I have a 5-year-old girl, and are not planning more children -- primarily because we are easily stressed, don't do well when sleep-deprived, and aren't really baby/toddler people. Our daughter was NOT an easy baby.

Yet, I always feel a twinge of sadness when another ...Read more

She moved on because he didn't text enough

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

I would like to hear your thoughts on what happened with a girl I was dating for two months. We went on dates every weekend, where I also stayed at her place. We texted each other during the week. On our last date, she said I don't text enough and that she had started to chat with someone on a dating app because of it.

They ...Read more

 
 

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