Ask Amy: Parents outraged that daughter is with married man
Your daughter has been hurt and she is now consciously hurting someone else.
If your daughter lives with you, it would be best for her to move out. If she is not in your household, you won’t be quite so tempted to monitor and react to her behavior.
You don’t know why she is doing this. I don’t know why she is doing this. I think it’s possible that she also doesn’t quite know why she has made this choice.
She should be meeting with a counselor.
Discussing dubious choices with a neutral therapist is much more productive than trying to defend indefensible behavior to your furious parents.
I suggest that you convey to her: “You know how we feel about your decisions, which we believe are setting you back. We hope that you will choose to behave ethically. But we also understand that this is your life, and the consequences will be yours to bear.”
Dear Amy: I have a young relative I really adore, whose pursuits I have always wholeheartedly supported.
Several months ago, she was offered a truly once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to take an open-ended job of very uncertain duration overseas. This opportunity could last for several years.
I encouraged her to jump at this chance.
She has a cat that she needed to rehome, and I somewhat reluctantly offered to take the cat.
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