Ask Amy: Friend’s swerving is quite unnerving
His family will probably not be happy with this, but it will keep the cost down.
I know the subject will come up again, so I will have to be firm in stating that this is my husband's wishes.
I feel bad for his family because I don't think they are getting the closure they desire. I’m not sure how to handle this except to tell them that I am abiding by my husband's wishes.
– Grieving Wife
Dear Grieving: Providing the preferred method of closure for your late husband’s family is not your responsibility.
Honoring his wishes and taking care of yourself is your responsibility.
Plan your celebration, let all of your in-laws know, answer any questions they have, and move forward.
Dear Amy: In a recent answer to “Loving, but Sad Daughter,” you wrote: "[Your father's] Wikipedia entry should be revised. You could edit it yourself ..."
That's not quite right. Wikipedia tries to discourage people from editing articles about their close relatives, for the hopefully obvious reason that it's hard to be objective and neutral while writing about your father, for example.
The rules on that can be complex; basically she would need to make an edit request on the Wikipedia article talk page and wait for an uninvolved volunteer editor to do the actual work.
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