Ask Amy: Estrangement from family is hard to describe
I decided to have nothing more to do with any of them.
I don't know what my sister has been told, but I don't care anymore.
Amy, I feel free. With each passing month, I feel lighter. I’m convinced that never being in contact with them again is the best thing for me.
My problem is that I don't know what to say to people who don't know we're estranged when they ask me how they are. What should I say if people ask about our estrangement?
So far I just say, lightly and without any drama, that I don't want to talk about them.
Do you have better suggestions?
– Fancy Free
Dear Fancy Free: Congratulations on your liberation. Your family of origin seems to present genuine dangers to your own mental and emotional health.
The fact that you are so concerned about how to describe this estrangement to others means that you’re still working through your choice.
You don’t need to explain or describe your situation. When people ask you about your family members, you can say, “I haven’t seen them in a while. Honestly I don’t know how they are.”
...continued
