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Ask Amy: RV trip could be a heroes’ journey

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Accept his choices and this ambiguity with as much openness and equanimity as you can.

You being open about your feelings and your fears is only speaking to your own experience – not trying to control him. Your ambivalence in the past might speak to a deep fear of being hurt, but making that leap into full trust – of him and of yourself – is the brave and romantic RV hero-journey that you’re facing.

Speaking as someone who found “the best one” later in life, I’d like to testify to the transforming nature of a truly committed relationship between two equals.

If you want this, then go get it.

Dear Amy: A few months ago, a group of my coworkers went out for happy hour. We were talking about how our jobs can make relationships challenging. I mentioned a coworker going through a divorce. I didn’t mention her name, but another coworker said, “Oh, you’re talking about ‘Tammy’! She’s a good friend of mine!”

Everyone knows and likes Tammy. We were all in agreement that we disliked what her husband was putting her through.

 

Tammy called me and said that she heard that I’ve been talking about her. Whoever told her this said that I told the group some terrible things about her child and ex-husband.

I told her I never said what she was accusing me of. No one else said it, either. It was completely false.

I told her that the person that shared this false information is obviously someone that she trusts. I can tell that she doesn’t believe me.

I don’t know if I should demand that she tell me who said this about me, or if I should leave it alone. I really like her and I’m sad about how she now perceives me.

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