Ask Amy: RV trip could be a heroes’ journey
In the past, I've been accused (by an ex) of ambivalence, but now I feel consumed by the need to be by his side.
His ex was controlling to the nth degree.
How do I balance his abhorrence of control, where I want to see him more?
I figure I have at least 10 more good years, and I've found the best, at last.
I want this!
– Tom
Dear Tom: So far, you and “Dave” are taking things very slowly – and it seems to me that in terms of this relationship, you are making good choices.
You’ve proven that you can communicate well, and so you should continue.
Does he want to have a full, non-platonic, monogamous relationship with you? You should ask him. You should also be completely transparent about your concerns about your own preferences and past experiences.
If he values monogamy and yet doesn’t care if you continue seeing other people, then it’s possible that he isn’t ready – or doesn’t want to – commit to you.
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