Life Advice

/

Health

Ask Amy: Mom frets about daughter’s disordered eating

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Concerned: As with some other diseases, eating disorders can flare – even many years after successful treatment. Stress is a definite risk factor, and can lead to a relapse.

Understand a basic truth: We all become most defensive when confronted with our deepest vulnerabilities.

Your daughter is an adult. She is ultimately responsible for managing her health.

Her eating disorder can be considered a chronic disease. If she had an auto-immune disease (also triggered by stress), you would want to prompt her to take care of her health.

Expressing your concern in a loving way might trigger a defensive reaction.

And yet – you are her mother, and if you are brave enough to talk to her, you will be demonstrating that you care, that you are on her side, that you see her eating disorder as an illness and not a character flaw, and that you are available for help if she needs it.

 

Talk to her: “This is such a stressful time for you. I’m worried that your eating disorder could flare. How are you managing your health right now? Can I help you in any way?”

She may respond, “Mom – stop.” And that’s OK. You can respond, “Honey – I do worry, but I can handle my own anxieties. I just want you to know that I’ve got your back. Always.”

The National Eating Disorders Association (nationaleatingdisorders.org) offers helpful advice for families.

Dear Amy: My beloved husband left this physical earth 20 months ago.

...continued

swipe to next page

 

 

Comics

Lee Judge Loose Parts John Deering One Big Happy Pat Bagley Scary Gary