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Ask Amy: A grieving human might look over the rainbow

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I’m devastated with grief from losing my beloved dog to cancer five weeks ago. He was only five.

I have good counselors, supportive friends and family, and a loving husband, but I’m struggling a lot with depression and grief.

I’m almost 40, but have never lost anyone close to me before, and this was my first pet.

I loved that dog wholeheartedly and can’t seem to come to terms with how that sweet, innocent dog had to suffer, and how much emptier our life and home feel without him.

I know we gave our dog a wonderful life and did everything we could for him, and I know so many other people have also experienced this loss, but I’m still swimming in grief and in so much pain that I haven’t given much attention to my relationship with my husband or nurtured him during this time (though I manage to be functional with work and other activities).

My husband is also grieving, but not visibly the way I am, and he’s often in the role of consoling me.

 

One of his wonderful qualities is that he is patient; at the same time, he is feeling insecure about our relationship because it feels like I’m not fully there.

I can’t seem to get outside of my grief.

Do I just give myself time for this grief to run its course, or is there a way I can course correct and not make my husband feel ignored and unseen during this time?

– Sad Pet Mom

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