Life Advice



Ask Amy: Married man wonders about platonic friend

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am a 39-year-old married man. I made a friend two years ago at work. She is 39, divorced, and lives alone. Our friendship built up over time and is solid.

Over the last few months, she has been opening up about her darkest feelings and deepest secrets. Best friends do share a lot, but I am unsure how much is too much. She has been behaving in a platonic way, but sometimes I do get vibes of this crossing the line.

I once felt that she wanted to give me a long hug but then walked away. (This was a very strong vibe.)

I had a quick and honest talk about her behavior. She confirmed that things are platonic, but I can't shake off these vibes.

During some conversations, the look in her eyes does tell me that something is up.

She has anxiety and depression and is on meds.


How should I manage this?

Should I assume that she isn't having feelings?

I am not someone who gives up on friends, but at the same time, I can't handle it if she develops feelings for me.

– KK


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