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Ask Amy: Father-in-law wants to hear his name

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

– Say My Name in Florida

Dear Say My Name: I know of younger generation in-laws who never address their elder parents-in-law by any specific name, because they’ve never had any direction from the elder and are too timid to ask.

Many people don’t feel comfortable calling their in-laws “Mom and Dad,” because they already have parents they address this way.

When the grandchildren come along, the elder finally has a real designation: “Grandpa.”

You don’t mention how your son addresses his parents-in-law (if he has them). This might provide some insight.

My point is that your daughter-in-law won’t know that this bothers you if you aren’t brave enough to gently tell her.

 

So, you say, “This might sound like a minor thing, but would you mind calling me by my first name? I am cool being “Grandpa” when we’re with the kids or referring to the kids, but otherwise I’d love it if you would just call me ‘Dave.’ Are you OK with that?”

She might be relieved to know your preference.

Dear Amy: I've recently become good friends with a woman and have begun to develop romantic feelings for her. We have spent a great deal of one-on-one time together over the past month, and on more than one occasion, we have shared moments that have led me to believe that the feeling might be mutual; eye contact, flirtatious language, and at one point, she admitted that she found me physically attractive.

There's just one catch: she is in a long-distance relationship with another man.

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