Life Advice



Ask Amy: Homemaker’s devotion is waste of a good career

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

She has maintained the household and has raised (your) children, and yet because she has been under-employed outside the home, she has “nothing to show for it?”

How about healthy children and a husband who doesn’t have to iron his own shirts?

According to an oft-quoted report by, in 2021 a stay-at-home parent works over 100 hours a week and would earn an annual “…fair market salary equivalent of $184,820.”

The question is: Do you owe this amount to your “lazy” wife, or do you two have a zero balance, because she was living the life she chose? (From your account, you have done the same.)

You obviously feel trapped, stuck financially supporting a family that – according to you – takes your hard-earned assets and returns nothing.

Your wife should not be taking out student loans. These loans are the worst bet in the world and paying them back will deplete the gains she might see from her additional degree.


You two should immediately seek the help of a marriage counselor. Additionally, you could investigate a post-nuptial agreement to outline the financial terms by which you quite obviously define the relative success of your marriage.

Dear Amy: I'm sharing my family’s holiday strategy in case someone else thinks it's workable for their family.

We have had our own disagreements and hurt feelings over the years.

I remind everyone that the holidays are not about the hurt, but about celebrating together as a family and creating memories of togetherness.


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