Life Advice



Ask Amy: Affair between neighbors leads to awkward silence

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am a 56-year-old woman. When I was growing up, my father had an affair with “Sarah,” our next-door neighbor. This affair lasted for many years.

Everyone knew about it — at least everyone in my family knew (my mom, my brother, and myself).

My dad died 17 years ago. Sarah has also died.

My mother is 87, has some dementia, and seems to have forgotten everything about this, which is good.

My question is: At the time, I was very close to “Annie,” Sarah’s daughter.

During all of those years, starting from a very young age, I said nothing to her. Now, I see Annie and her sister’s photos on Facebook, and I have a hankering to contact them to ask if they were aware of this affair.


Their father is still alive.

What would be the point of this? I really don't know.

It was like the unspoken secret for so many years.

And, if they do not know about this, then why would I want to hurt them by telling them about this sordid history between their mother and my father, right?


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