Ask Amy: Sisters should lay their problems to rest
I am also now a part of this chat, and it drives me insane.
I have started to completely ignore all texts that I receive through this chat, but it makes me feel rude and I can tell the other family members have noticed me distancing.
I haven't experienced anything like this in my own past.
How can I escape this daily pinging without seeming cold-hearted or uninterested in their lives?
– Batty Over Banter
Dear Batty: It is healthy, and I think preferable, for an in-law to assume an attitude of friendly reserve toward the daily shenanigans of a clan this close and connected. This would translate into you either exiting, muting, or asking someone to remove you from the group-chat before this drives you completely ‘round the bend.
Being “disinterested” is different from being “uninterested.” To be disinterested is to be reserved and impartial. To be uninterested is to not care.
I suggest you become disinterested before this irritates you so much that you become uninterested.
Then, you can pursue these friendships and relationships in your own way and time.
When I married into a very large clan, I asked to be removed from mass family communications early on, and I assume everyone is glad that I did.