Life Advice



Ask Amy: Trauma survivor worries about a deep dive

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

You are hard on yourself the way survivors often are. It goes with the territory.

Please understand that your therapist is offering you a place of safety where you can be brave, frightened, unsure, upset, confident, confused, and emotional.

All of these feelings and reactions are completely legitimate because they are authentically yours.

He might point out that you needn’t “delve” or “dive,” but that you can safely allow yourself to “visit” the places that scare you the most and learn to allow these negative emotions and memories to flow through you, instead of staying with you.

Self-awareness and self-acceptance will allow you to soften, and although it’s something of a cliché, “making friends” with the vulnerable and hurting younger version of you will help you to close the loop and move forward as a fully integrated person with a tough past, and a very bright future.

Dear Amy: Is it rude to yawn while talking to someone if you make an honest effort to hide/stifle it, and apologize or say, "Excuse me?”


I suffer from depression and often don't sleep well.

I also have sinus issues which can make it difficult to breathe.

My boyfriend knows these things, yet he still becomes irate when I yawn during conversations.

He says it is dismissive and rude, even though I use verbal and physical cues to show that I'm still listening.


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