Ask Amy: Older sister may be overly ‘sistering’
In your family’s case, your mother’s choice to give in to your sister’s control over who visits her own household speaks volumes.
The passive-aggressive silencing technique and avoidance might extend back into previous generations.
You are obviously bugging these younger family members, and my instinct is that if you are substantially older than they are, and if you see yourself as a mother figure to them, you are most likely weighing in on their choices and intruding on social media, where the tone of a comment or reply can easily be misunderstood.
This is – at best – uncool. At worst, it is intrusive and embarrassing.
Your sister has asked for “some space,” and you should respect her request and give her space.
And because your family members are both volatile and avoidant, you should review your own tone on social media and elsewhere and consider doing things differently.
Dear Amy: I know you have been tackling lots of questions about vaccination (and receiving some heat). Honestly, I believe that people have the right to keep their status private. I would never ask about someone’s vaccination choice.
I’m not sure why people feel the need to know about others’ vaccinations.
Your take on this?
– Wondering
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