Ask Amy: Dad is sad that wife has become ‘mom’
Dear Amy: My spouse has changed so much, and I no longer enjoy her company.
As parents of two young children, we are pretty good parents and partners. Unfortunately, that is the only thing we are now.
She no longer cares about us as a couple, and only has enough bandwidth for our kids.
Everything else comes second, and my wish for a life partner is a distant third.
Our sex life is literally dead.
I love my children so deeply and have no desire to end our parenting partnership (for their sake), but the “adult woman” I married is just not there anymore – there is only “mom.”
I have made my complaints known to her in a way that is not hurtful, but honestly speaking, she either does not have the bandwidth for it or she just does not see it as a priority.
Out of curiosity, if your husband was to say this to you, what would your response be?
– Sad Dad
Dear Sad: You have framed this asking how I would respond if this question had been posed to me, and yet I never had the opportunity to address this, because my own (first) marriage just quietly and suddenly ended, rather than either partner being brave enough to talk about it beforehand.