Ask Amy: Widower ponders the ticktock of moving on
The following is from a study of 350 widows and widowers, published by the National Institutes of Health:
“By 25 months after the spouse's death, 61 percent of men and 19 percent of women were either remarried or involved in a new romance. Women expressed more negative feelings about forming new romantic relationships.”
The study concludes: “Greater psychological well-being was highly correlated with being remarried or in a new romance 25 months after the spouse's death. It may be helpful for family, friends, and therapists to know that dating and remarriage are common and appear to be highly adaptive behaviors among the recently bereaved.”
Dear Amy: A former colleague is getting married this summer. We were close when we worked together and have kept in touch through the years.
Due to current restrictions, no significant others have been invited to the event. It is not nearby.
No one I really know will be in attendance.
OK, bottom line, I do not want to go.
If we still worked together that would be a different story.
I will send a card and a gift, of course.
Why am I so torn about not going?
...continued
