Life Advice



Ask Amy: Quinceanera guests’ drinks may drain dad’s funds

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear High and Dry: You should meet with your ex and her husband, and the three of you should go over the details and the related costs of this important – and sometimes lavish — celebration (traditionally given for Latinx girls on their 15th birthday).

According to, the costs for a “quince” celebration range between $5,000 to $20,000.

I assume your ex is aware of your financial situation, as well as the disproportional representation of your family members at the party. Yes, you could certainly offer to cover half of the costs, minus alcohol.

You must be honest about your personal limit, and also offer to find ways to cut costs. You might be able to raise additional funds from your daughter’s padrinos and madrinas (godparents and friends), who traditionally sometimes choose to honor the family by taking on an expense related to the celebration.

Dear Amy: My husband and I got married 35 years ago.

Our wedding was wonderful — with one exception that still haunts me today.


After sending out the invitations, I heard back from everyone except about a half dozen people.

At the time, I asked my mother who always knew the socially correct action to take. (I still have her 1920s edition of Emily Post’s “Etiquette.”)

My mother advised me not to contact them so as to “not offend” their choice of not responding. So, I did nothing.

Long story short, these friends never got their invitations! I found out much later that they were extremely hurt because they thought they weren’t invited to our wedding!


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