Life Advice



Ask Amy: ‘Save-the-Date’ doesn’t lead to an invitation

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

I don't want to potentially make anyone feel bad. I had purchased a few new dresses and was looking forward to celebrating my friend's big day with my school family. Now I’m not sure what to do with this?

– Confused and Disappointed

Dear Confused: I am currently in possession of three summertime “Save-the-Dates” for wedding celebrations that still might not happen.

This past year has been so challenging for people trying to have wedding celebrations – please approach this with an understanding and tolerant attitude.

And ask her! Contact her to say, “I completely understand if your wedding plans have changed and your guest list has decreased, but I have a Save-the-Date and didn’t receive an invitation, so I’m still unsure of your final plans. Sorry to nudge you – I know things have been crazy – but please let me know if I’m still invited. If not, no worries, and I’ll send love and good vibes to you on the day.”

Dear Amy: I have an acquaintance, who every time I see her wants to hug me.


I don’t mind an occasional hug with someone, but this is almost like a demand.

This person is a neighbor. We are friendly with one another, but I wouldn’t characterize our relationship as a close friendship.

Since we have had our vaccinations, she uses it as an excuse: “Now we can hug!”

I do not want to be mean or alienate this person. I would like to stay on good neighborly terms.


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