Ask Amy: Risky roommate dynamic needs to change
I was shocked at how weirdly south that went, but also not surprised.
After these confrontations I'm left feeling awkward and ill-at-ease in our home for a few days and do my best to avoid him.
What do you think I should do about this?
– Really Done
Dear Done: You have the right to live in your own home without the pressure of tiptoeing around your roommate for several days after he lashes out.
You should take a long and careful look at whether you want to continue to cohabit with him. You don’t seem to feel unsafe, but you will have to gauge whether his volatility and behavior presents a safety issue for you.
You should also talk to him about his behavior – during a calm moment. Tell him, “I really like living with you. I value our friendship. But your anger seems to come out of nowhere. Maybe I should have said something earlier, but I’m saying it now. I truly do not know what’s going on with you, but I don’t like being confronted, yelled at, and cursed at.”
There are a multitude of possible explanations for why your roommate acts this way. He might offer up some reasons or excuses for his behavior. He might act out, curse you out, and ghost you. But you will have stated your case.
Dear Amy: Mother's Day will be upon us soon.
I am a resident of a senior living facility and have some suggestions for your readers: If your parent or loved one is in a senior living facility, she is more like a prisoner since the pandemic began.