Life Advice



Ask Amy: Poorly placed tattoo causes grief

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am a 47-year-old woman. My husband, “Bart,” (age 50) and I have been together for eight years. Bart is a firefighter in a large city.

Bart has several tattoos on this left arm (a “sleeve”).

His tattoos are tasteful and well thought out.

Whenever he considers a new tattoo, he takes his ideas and rough sketch to his tattoo artists. He then carefully reconsiders the design and placement on this arm. He takes a lot of time before finally getting inked.

Two days ago, Bart told me that he was going to get some touch-ups done on his existing tattoos. This is not unusual.

When he arrived back home, he not only had the touch-ups done, but a brand-new tattoo.


This new tattoo is approximately 8 inches long – starting at his neck and going right down the middle of his chest. It is not the tattoo that was shocking to me, but the placement of it.

The tattoos on his arm never bothered me. But I cried for hours the first night he had his new one.

Bart asked if we could talk about it, but I knew I would react in a way that was not going to be positive for the relationship, so I just said, “I can’t talk about it yet.”

I am now on day three, and my feelings about this have not changed. I am still visibly upset.


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