Ask Amy: Child-averse couple faces kid kryptonite
– Not a Kid Person
Dear Not a Kid Person: I have been a part of many family groups where the woman is automatically assigned the role of camp counselor and kid wrangler, while the male partner behaves more as a helpful guest, dipping in and out and occasionally grilling meat for dinner.
Maybe you should be the secondary host and primary grill-master during these visits.
Unfortunately, in addition to not being a “kid person,” you also don’t want to see photos of children or listen to parents discuss them. You also don’t want to engage in conversations involving “doomscrolling,” (which is an outsized interest in negative news).
I know that you must have some reserve of patience because you have a dog, so you should work on applying more tolerance toward the people in your life, because your parameters are so limiting that it is as if you are setting yourself – and especially these children – up for failure.
Keep the visit short. Three nights might be best, especially if you have family members staying with you, otherwise, a local motel with a pool would be ideal.
Prepare your house (the way you might for unfamiliar dogs) by tucking away valuables, breakables, and medication.
Ask these parents for ideas in terms of keeping the children occupied, fed and watered, but remember that their parents should always be in charge of them.
Depending on the age of the children, I would plan one larger outing for the morning/lunch, and one mini-outing (including grandparents) for the afternoon.
Dear Amy: My fiancé and I are getting married this summer.