Ask Amy: Daughter worries about dad’s behavior
What can I do to deal with my father?
— Very Concerned Daughter
Dear Daughter: You cannot control your father. If he doesn’t believe the CDC or pay attention to the various spikes and real risks of this virus, he’s not going to listen to you. Your only leverage is access to your baby, and he doesn’t seem interested in seeing the child.
If your mother is extremely concerned about her (and your) health, and yet won’t live with you because she doesn’t want your dad to “win the house,” then I’d say that her health concerns aren’t actually paramount.
If she is worried about her legal rights to the marital property if she left the home for an extended period, it would be wisest for her to consult with a lawyer.
The good news is that because of their broken relationship, your parents very likely keep their distance from each other while in their home. Your mother is observing safe COVID practice while she is with you. All of you should continue to guard your own health.
If you truly believe that your mother is placing her own health (and yours) at enhanced risk by living with your father, you should not ask her to come into your home until she can receive a vaccine.
Your family is exemplifying the challenges and compromises that most families have been facing. Worrying does not help. Mitigating your risks does.
Dear Amy: I have a woman friend whose lease is up at the end of the month. She asked about moving in with me. I’m retired, never married, and we have gone out about three times as friends, but I can see spending the rest of my life with her (she is 20 years younger).
The house I own is small and I have a male housemate, also retired, living in one of the bedrooms. The other bedroom is for his home-based business.