Ask Amy: Vaccination questions raise privacy concerns
You don’t say what his ailments are, but I think you would feel better if you knew his medical status. You should try to connect with the medical director or a social worker at his nursing home to find out what his diagnosis is and how he is doing now.
Dementia can bring on violent surges in some people. The more you learn about this, the more understanding and forgiving you might be able to be.
You have to ask yourself, realistically, how you would feel if you never saw your brother again. If he died without you making an effort to resolve your own feelings toward him, would you regret it?
If you decide to visit, make sure another person (an aide, social worker, or friend) is with you the entire time you are in any proximity to your brother.
Dear Amy: "Hate to Ask" wanted to request that her mother's friend split the proceeds from a mutual fund that her mother had bequeathed to him, since it had increased substantially in value.
The question she should be asked is: If the fund had gone bankrupt, would she be so eager to contact him and reallocate the inheritance by splitting her share with him?
— Harry in CT
Dear Harry: Excellent logic. Thank you.
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