Ask Amy: Mom’s martyrdom creates a man-boy monster
Dear Amy: My live-in boyfriend of four years is selfish, defiant, impatient and impossible to talk to.
He instantly puts up his guard, starts yelling and deflecting!
I always end up giving up before he rages and confuses me by turning every conversation around.
I love him so much. I know he loves me too. But sometimes, I need him to grow up.
I have a 15-year-old son. I had my son when I was 22. I was forced to grow up fast.
My boyfriend has never lived with a girlfriend before and doesn’t have children.
But I’m a mother and a nurturer. I love taking care of “my Boys,” but it is never, ever reciprocated. He can’t do anything for himself. I am expected to do everything! He works from home, and usually starts drinking at around noon. He averages around 15 beers a day.
I have been sober for one year. Talking to him in the evening is out of the question. He is a complete jerk when he has been drinking.
How do I talk to him about his selfishness?
My good feelings toward him are starting to change.
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