Ask Amy: Cultural divide leads to family estrangement
Your friend was wisely reluctant to provide her Social Security number, but I wonder if she realizes what a POD is and why you are attempting to do this? She may believe that you are asking her to co-sign a loan, or co-own the account.
A POD has no access to the account, and no-risks regarding the account.
You seem to believe that she must agree to this arrangement in order to truly be your friend.
Not true! Cool down, explain it and if she wants to do this, give it another try. You should see if your bank would let you bring the form to her to fill out and mail.
Dear Amy: “Hanging On” described her longtime partner as wearing dirty clothes, lying around all day, and emotionally shut down.
This is depression! I was disappointed that you didn’t suggest she see a therapist.
— Disappointed
Dear Disappointed: The partner has refused counseling. I agree that she might be depressed, but “Hanging On” also described a 30-year relationship marked by enabling and co-dependency. I urged Hanging On to find ways to take better care of herself.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2020 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
