ArcaMax

Dear Amy: Am I being unreasonable? I told my husband that if we were to pay a visit to his sister’s home, we should stay in a hotel because she doesn’t turn on the heat (she lives in Canada and we live in a warm state), and because she insists on taking us to their Jehovah’s Witness Church and making us watch videos about their faith.

I do not want my children exposed to that. My husband says it’s only one time and will not be enough time to indoctrinate our children. We are relaxed Catholics.

I don’t mind visiting her city in Canada without seeing her, but my husband says that’s rude.

This situation has come up often, and we can’t seem to agree. Am I wrong? Am I being juvenile? Should I just suck it up?

— Distressed Mama

Dear Distressed: As of this writing, the border between the U.S. and Canada is (basically) closed, due to the pandemic.

If things open up, you won’t have to face any of these choices if you simply decide to let your husband take the kids to see his sister, while you stay home.

I almost always think a hotel or motel stay is preferable to inconveniencing a host for an extended stay, especially if there are kids involved (and if the hotel has a pool).

However, when it comes to the lack of heat in her home, as we who live in the Frozen North like to say (between the months of October and May), “put on a sweater.”

Regarding her faith practice, I fail to see what is so dangerous or damaging about witnessing how people of other faiths worship, but if this (sometimes intense) fellowship is in direct spiritual conflict with your own “relaxed” practice, then the wisest choice might be for your husband to skip the visit to the Kingdom Hall altogether, or agree to a truncated visit, drive separately, and meet his sister afterward.

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