Ask Amy: Old love letters don’t age so well
You cannot control how your husband conducts his relationships. He sounds like a very nice guy who may feel an unconscious need to initiate contact with his midwestern siblings because he chose to move so far away, while they stayed close to home.
Yes, his siblings should worry about you both. Yes, they should get in touch to make sure you are OK and to offer support. If your husband didn’t reach out as often, his siblings might choose to pick up the phone, but you should not push him to cut them off out of spite (he likely benefits from these chats).
Ideally, he would tell them how he feels: “I’m always the one to get in touch, and I feel like you’ve forgotten me in between phone calls. I’d really appreciate it if you reciprocated once in a while.”
Dear Amy: “Struggling” wrote about lending her partner money that, following his death, his parents declined to repay.
While I agree with your advice, in similar circumstances I would also suggest that anyone in this situation file a claim against the deceased party’s estate. There is a statute of limitations to do that, which lenders can easily research.
— A, in Arlington, Virginia
Dear A: Thank you.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
