Ask Amy: Tragic loss brings on a strange family demand
You do not need to create excuses, or explain yourself. Simply tell your friend, “I hate to miss this, but as you know, I am laying very low these days.”
You might choose to send her a gift from her registry and a handwritten card.
Dear Amy: “Loving Daughter” was trying to figure out how to tackle her 90-year-old mother’s unhealthy hoarding.
My sister and I did exactly as you suggested and had one sibling take mom out while the other cleaned, organized, and removed trash.
When mom came home, she was not happy – but she didn’t complain. In fact, I think she was relieved. I think she had become paralyzed by her situation.
Improved
Dear Improved: Hoarding is a serious disorder. It is overwhelming for the entire family system.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
