Life Advice



Ask Amy: Rent-paying parent wonders where checks landed

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am retired. My grown daughter has always held a job and paid her bills on time.

Because of the COVID virus, her income has dropped substantially. I offered to pay her rent, and have done so for the past four months.

My concern is this: I write the check payable to the landlord of her six-unit building, and she presents it.

She has been in the apartment for about three years and he has accommodated her by lowering her rent a little, in exchange for her taking care of the small front yard and shoveling snow in the winter.

I'm questioning if he is wondering why the checks are coming from me, and also why he has not deposited any of my checks.

I have not told my daughter that the checks have not been processed (and don't plan to tell her).


I just don't know if he just has irregular banking practices or if he is deliberately not cashing the checks to give my daughter a very generous, albeit confidential, break for four months. If this is the case, I feel extremely strongly that I should thank him.

Should I wait for another two months or so to see if he does finally process the checks, or should I send him a note now, assuming he is being kind and generous?

Confused by Appreciative

Dear Confused: You are overthinking this by a mile. First of all, your landlord is not going to care who is writing the rent check, as long as it clears. Many people are in the same position your daughter is in, and rent is coming in from unexpected quarters.


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