Ask Amy: New mate struggles to join pack
Dear Amy: Three months ago, I started dating a woman I've been very good friends with for two years.
She has a dog she adopted from a shelter 10 years ago. I love dogs.
We often take “Buster” for walks -- he is cute, friendly, and well-behaved, but he has incredible separation anxiety and barks (out of jealousy, not aggression) when I try to hold or kiss my girlfriend.
She spends the night at my apartment two or three nights a week and has to bring him because of his separation anxiety, but since her dog cannot physically be apart from her, he is up in bed with us. This makes me uncomfortable.
If he isn't allowed up, he digs at the carpet and barks until he is let up on the bed, where he wants to lick her face (and mine) until he settles down.
My girlfriend does nothing to discourage this behavior. I love spending time with her but between being barked at, the dog in bed, and having to listen to him lick her face for three minutes straight, I am very put off.
I explained to her that I don't really want to kiss her after her dog has licked her mouth for three minutes, or with him in the bed between us where he growls at me.
We love each other, but I am at a loss for where to go from here.
Confounded by a Canine
Dear Confounded: “Buster” has been with your girlfriend for much longer than you have (in human years, they would be celebrating their platinum anniversary!).