Life Advice



Ask Amy: Husband serves time for the sake of the kids

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I've been married to my wife since 2003. In 2011, I found her texting and flirting with a friend of mine. We ultimately broke up. It was pretty much a mutual decision.

I met another woman who was everything I dreamed of. I moved toward divorcing my wife. I wanted to move on with my life. Tragically, three years after falling in love, my fiance died...right in front of me.

Well, it turns out, my wife never filed the divorce papers, so we are still married.

We have two sons (both born before the breakup). Concerned for the well-being of my sons, I worked things out with her, and we got back together.

Fast-forward to today. I feel like I’m serving a jail sentence with this person. My oldest son is on his way to the Marines, and my youngest is on his way to sixth grade.

I am married to a selfish, unemotional woman who doesn't seem to have any love or compassion for me.


There is no communication, no intimacy, no anything!

I’ve got just over five years to go until my youngest will be 18. My plan is to move out the day after his birthday.

I've tried everything I can think of -- from talking to her directly to even talking to her mother. I'm afraid she's cheating again, but I have no proof. She just seems totally not interested in me at all. I love her, but my love is not reciprocated.

Should I ride this out until it goes down in flames -- or stick to the plan of just staying under the radar until my son turns 18 and then leave and ghost her?


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