ArcaMax

Dear Readers: Because of syndication scheduling, I write and submit my columns two weeks in advance of publication. Due to this time lag, the Q&A's will not reflect the latest information about the worldwide COVID-19 pandemic we are currently facing.

Dear Amy: I have abandonment issues. My biological mother left me when I was a baby. Due to the extreme parental neglect in my infancy, the courts awarded custody to my paternal grandmother. My father moved in with her as well.

In my mind, my father "saved" me from a world that I could've died in, but the truth is, he was just as responsible for my neglect.

My father remarried, and my grandmother allowed me to live with my dad in his new home with his new wife. I called her "Mom" until she passed away.

Mom was not affectionate toward me. She was very strict.

Fast-forward to now. I am 50 years old. My biological mother and stepmother are both dead. My father remarried again and moved hundreds of miles away.

My issue is a new resentment toward my father. Having learned that he wasn't the saint I always thought him to be, I find I don't want to speak to him much.

I love him very much, but I'm hurt that every woman in his life has had such an influence on him to the neglect of, not just me, but also my two half-sisters.

I don't really want to go down this path. My bitterness toward my biological mother, and lack of love from the woman that raised me has made me a cold person toward family. I feel more empathy toward strangers than my own relations (sometimes, even my own children, which I am acutely ashamed of).

Therapy is not easily accessible in my rural area, so I'm left to my own devices.

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