Mom wants 'frumpy' daughter to snag a man
Instead, I felt trapped with this mini-monster.
She is making noises about wanting to do this again. What should I say?
-- Recovering
Dear Recovering: Some people who are otherwise compatible just shouldn't travel together. "Clara" sounds like someone who basically goes feral the minute she crosses the county line. I know people like this, and I have been through these feral stages, myself.
When you saw the direction things were headed with her, you should have carried on with your own plans -- hiking, bird-watching, and basically having some of the experiences you wanted to have.
You should be honest with her: "I love spending time with you, but we travel really differently. I'm going to pass on another vacation."
Dear Amy: "Suspicious Daughter" was upset because her older dad was in a relationship with a much younger woman. Thank you for basically telling her to mind her own business!
-- Older and Wiser
Dear Wiser: It can be very hard for family members to let go. An abundance of concern can turn into an abundance of control.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
