Life Advice



Wife wonders if separation is permanent

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My husband and I have been married for 12 years. We have two children together.

I can fully admit that the last few years have not been our best. We've argued frequently.

Six months ago, he moved out for what was supposed to be a short-term break. During that time, he has been treated for depression and anxiety.

Over and over, he has maintained that his only goal is to get well enough to come home to be a family, but I feel like I'm being led on with false promises.

He constantly sets milestones he wants to reach before he can come home. Every time he reaches a milestone he sets, he sets another, and then another.

Am I just incredibly naive to think that he will actually move back as he has promised?


I wrestle with constantly feeling hurt. I've become resentful for parenting on my own.

I've had to explain his absence to our children and respond to their hurt feelings when he says he will be home and then doesn't show up.

Should I remain supportive while he works through his issues or has this gone on past the point of what is reasonable and do I end the marriage and go our separate ways?

-- Hurt Wife


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