ArcaMax

After you book your rental, notify The Parents and Grandparents: "We're renting a place -- only 10 minutes away. We're really excited for our annual reunion, and can't wait to see everybody!"

Assuming responsibility for where you will sleep is not being disrespectful or ungrateful. You are behaving like an adult and showing up for your family.

Convey this idea: "We love this tradition so much and look forward to it all year. We're going to hang out at the big house with everyone, but we need some privacy at night." Don't involve the other Kids in this, and don't gossip about it.

The Parents and The Grandparents will see this as an important change. They don't have to like your choice. If you feel rested and more relaxed, you will be more available to pour attention and affection onto your elders, which you should do.

Dear Amy: What is my obligation to my ex-wife regarding travel? We've been divorced for over four years and have two daughters, age 9 and 15. We share custody 50/50, on duty every other week.

When I make plans to take the girls out of town overnight, she insists that I tell her the address of where we are staying.

Last weekend, my girlfriend and I took our daughters to a friend's lake house, 90 minutes away.

I only told my ex where we were because one of my girls had plans with her mom the next day, and she hadn't told her we were gone.

You would think I took them to the moon, judging by the text message tirade.

I believe I can take my own children wherever I want during my parenting time, as long as they are with me and safe, without notifying my ex-wife. She thinks this makes me an a--hole. What do you think?

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