Older husband is eager to father a child
One way to help people who approach you outside the office is to respond with compassion, and offer a resource in lieu of an extended conversation. Then you should establish a boundary. For instance:
SHE: I'm so worried about Chad. I think he's depressed.
YOU: I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't help with this, but I can give you or him a referral if you want. Here's my card.
SHE: But what can I do if he won't get help?
YOU: Let's not talk about this right now, but call or email me on Monday and I'll give you a referral. Will you do that?
Dear Amy: "Afraid of the Past" was fearful of running into an abusive ex. You said some of her options were: "escape, avoidance, confrontation." You also suggested that she practice various scenarios.
Amy, this is exactly what I did! Practicing helped me to prepare for the eventual encounter. I chose "avoidance," but next time I might make a different choice. Anyway, I feel more empowered.
-- No Longer Afraid
Dear No Longer Afraid: This is great! Good for you.
(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)