Ex needs to break-up a second time
Now it seems that you feel obligated to do whatever Tiffany asks, including moving her and her family across a great distance.
Tiffany may be trying to take advantage of your guilt -- it's hard to tell, since she also seems to be acting like there is an assumption of friendship.
Regardless, Tiffany did not rush in and carry you out of a burning building. She merely let you betray and break up with her. Your guilt should not translate into a lifetime of obligations.
I take it that even though you feel terrible about causing the end of your good relationship, you don't want to continue in any kind of friendship. So ... you're going to have to break up with Tiffany again. Only this time, you're going to have to go all-in: "Tiffany, the reason I don't communicate much with you is because I have emotionally moved on from our relationship. I continue to feel terrible about my behavior. You did nothing to deserve that. I want to be honest with you. I don't want to ghost you. But I don't want to continue our friendship."
You are not responsible for Tiffany's reactions to you. Be honest, be kind, but do not string her along unless you are willing to sincerely engage in a friendship with her (and possibly also rotate her tires).
Dear Amy: A close friend of mine is dating a married man, "Wendell," whose wife is in a nursing home.
I am not comfortable with this. I believe in adhering to your marriage vows.
She includes him in all of our friends' group activities, such as dinners, parties, etc. I am polite but do not plan to include him in my future plans, such as my children's weddings, etc.
What's the best way to navigate this? My friend is very defensive about him.
-- Upset Friend
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