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Parents want boyfriend to go, daughter follows

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

In this case, because you are married, ideally you would view your own behavior through your spouse's eyes. If he knew about it, how would your behavior make your husband feel?

If your husband behaved this way, how would you feel?

And not to put too fine a point on it, Mr. X might also be married. Or he might simply be a serial flirtist who doesn't worry about the possible consequences, because he doesn't face any consequences.

Online connections definitely foster all sorts of boundary-breaking behavior, because you tell yourself that, because all of the behavior is occurring virtually, it's "not real." Problems set in when virtual behavior becomes very real.

It's fun to flirt, and it can be fun to be flirted at. If this is truly harmless, then ... enjoy! But harmless flirting often leads to less-harmless flirting, where you form intimate connections that will undermine your primary relationship, which is your marriage.

Women and men can definitely have lovely and fulfilling friendships without flirting. I highly recommend it.

Dear Amy: I agree with your advice that "Moving On" should drop her obnoxious, tone deaf friend of 35 years, but disagree that it will be painful.

Like Moving On, I am part of a longtime group of friends. One in our group slowly morphed into Marie Antoinette.

 

The shameless social climber was confronted, and bowed out of the group.

That was three years ago, and I didn't miss our 30-year friendship for a minute. It's quite easy to move on when you no longer share values.

-- Free at Last

Dear Free: Dropping a friend can be painful ... until the overwhelming relief sets in.

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)


 

 

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