Life Advice

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Health & Spirit

Parents want boyfriend to go, daughter follows

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: Five years ago, I entered a relationship with a woman I had dated in junior high school, way back in 1980.

We met as friends, the relationship blossomed, and we were married about 20 months later.

At the time we reconnected, my wife's daughter, "Tamryn," was 14. She is now 20. Tamryn and I had the usual battles, but got along pretty well until this past winter when Tamryn, for reasons escaping us, didn't think we'd notice that her then 17-year-old boyfriend, "Brian," was basically living with us.

Brian turned 18 early this spring and is graduating from high school, but Brian being a minor was only part of the issue we had with him living with us.

He was eating with us, she was doing his wash and he was taking showers, etc., but contributing nothing to the household.

Tamryn's mother and I confronted her and presented her with an ultimatum -- we said he could stay over on Friday and Saturday nights, but that's all.

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Tamryn chose instead to move out. She moved in with Brian and his grandparents.

This was not the outcome we were hoping for, but we were not going to allow them to "play house" at our home, either.

My wife misses Tamryn dearly, and I feel some guilt about her leaving.

Any advice on this situation?

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