Mother's suicide affects generations of family
Dear Amy: My mother committed suicide in 1970. I found her body. I was seven months pregnant at the time, and it was extremely traumatic.
When my daughter was old enough to ask about her grandmother, the only thing I told her was that she died before my daughter was born.
Through the years she would ask me how her grandmother had died, but I could never tell her. It was just too horrible to talk about with a child, and I was also irrationally afraid that my daughter would try to do the same thing.
I have been in counseling for years (off and on) over this issue.
I have a sister who was visiting her boyfriend when this happened to our mother.
When my daughter was a senior in high school, she and I stayed with my sister for a weekend.
I went to bed early one night and they stayed up visiting.
The next morning my sister told me that my daughter had asked how our mother died, and she told her.
I felt completely betrayed. I am sure that once my daughter was an adult I would have told her how her grandmother died. My daughter and I are very close.
Am I justified in being angry with my sister for telling my daughter the truth without consulting me first? This has bothered me for a long time. My sister never had any children.
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