Mom is giving her toddler melatonin; is this safe?
"I'm more concerned about the lack of willing adults in the home while the mother is out; awake or asleep; children need to be under the care of a capable, willing adult, which doesn't seem to completely be the case here. I believe you're right to be concerned."
Dr. Navsaria and I agree that you should share your concerns, gently and without judgment. "Partying" implies activities inappropriate for parents of young children, but if your friend is just going out a few times a month, perhaps you could offer to help in some way. A once-a-month overnight at your house for the toddler would be generous.
Dear Amy: I'm a young adult and have been wrestling with a dilemma. My parents adopted me and my sibling from a foreign country. Our parents are wonderful, and we have had fantastic childhoods.
I am growing more curious about my ethnic and national birth heritage. I'd like to obtain my birth records in order to learn more.
My mom has a file with our records, but she is so sensitive about this -- I don't want to upset her by asking to see my records.
What do you suggest?
-- Curious
Dear Curious: It is natural (and appropriate) for you to want to learn more about your birth heritage. And even the most progressive parents sometimes struggle with the realization that their children have different DNA and ethnic histories than they do.
Your parents don't see you as "adopted." You are their child, plain and simple. Asking for your records will remind your mother of your reality, and this might be hard for her.
Understand this going in, and tell yourself that you are strong enough to accept and absorb her emotional reaction.
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